E4L :)
My
DEARest Charlene,
Things have not been too good. Today (30 October 2006) is the FIRST TIME I'm experiencing from a minor-soon-to-be-major panic attack. I am suddenly overwhelmed by the amount of crap I have to study for. Not only for Humanities, but the pressure is definately on for my Maths and Chemistry. My Literature paper is THIS THURSDAY and I am already freaking out. I am at the mercy of my Chemistry papers because I'm dropping Physics. A and E Maths is staring at me point blank because I am expected to get an A. Geography is crying tears of desparation because I have an immense amount of content to be memorised. I am practically shaking at the thought of it. My lack of effort will certainly pull me down faster than you can say "Titanic". I am such an idiot for not studying and panicking earlier. Now I am super busy because of countless appointments I booked with my teachers, mainly for my Humanities subjects. I am feeling like.. I don't know. My heart has never experienced such heart rate in a long time. Today I think I burned more calories than I ever had in a single day. Today is the day to remember where the mighty Denise Cheong is falling mercy to her studies. Today marks the fall of my confidence and therefore, marks the mere beginning of shame and much sadness to come.
Don't worry, I love you still. All the best to you. :)
Denise Cheong
Dear Charlene,
It's a Thursday morning and i'm supposed to be in school because of an appointment Yi Ling, Frippiat, Jane and I made with our Physics teacher. But Jane is sick, and Yi Ling and Frippiat are in school already and they say Mrs Yip most probably won't be coming because of Science practicals today so they say i don't have to go because they are leaving soon. -.- Communication breakdowns.. And they say technology has improved communication.. -.-I got more hazy pictures from my husband yesterday. You can go and check them out. Pretty cool. PSI is a reasonably low of 63 today! How wonderful yet disappointing.. Wanted the haze to stay longer.. I mean, you have to admit it is so so cool to have haze in our very own little Singapore and to be the ones to experience it first hand! To see the roads being all foggy, not being able to see the other end of our streets, dwelling in out mist-covered spaces, smelling the faint smell of smoke, come out of the house feeling dreamy and dazed. (: I think I'll miss the haze and the cute PSI readings on the little left hand corner of Channel 5. It sickens me to think I have to start memorising my humanities subjects. I think today will be a good start. I think I'll start with Social Studies. I think Chapter 1 of our Secondary 4 textbook is quite important - Healthcare and the Welfare State Chapter. But it's a freaking long chapter and I'm too lazy to study it, especially since I'm already brave and enough to try to commit to memory Chapter 4 and 5 - Sustaining Economic Growth in the 21st Century and Good Governance. Only the brave and the strong and the foolishly daring people are studying those 2 chapters. And unfortunately that foolish person is going to be me this year. So I don't know. I scared Chapter 1 really come out. -.- Haix. What now. I think it's a good day to start memorising stuff. I think I'll do my comb humans today. And I'll do some Chemistry too. ):Okay, enough about studies. I bring EXCITING news! Last night a particular someone replied and we exchanged messages THREE times. So next time you see my phone, you'll see a most delightful name appear in the first few messages of my inbox. ;) You know who I'm talking about yah. He had science practicals today, just like you! :D*Bounces around* I feel happy today. ALL YOU PEOPLE BETTER NOT SPOIL MY DAY. Hahahahaha. Jonny Bravo is depressed. (not really.) HAha. I dared him to put my name DENISE CHEONG at the "Worship Leader" part of the bulletin. But he don't want lah, I don't want him to get into trouble and lose his job. Then now economy so bad (not really either), very difficult to find job especially for a man of his years. Then if he no more job, cannot support poor wife and kids, cannot give his kids a good education, or even a good childhood. Devoid of joy and financial help, he and his family would not be able to carry on living. Cannot pay electricity bills, cannot pay house rent, cannot even afford to buy milk for their new-born daughter Jonathania (HAHAHA - I just made that up). Poor thing. So how can i even THINK about making him lose his job?! I am appalled at the extent of my sheer intelligence sometimes. I think I'll hack into his computer (like he always hacks into mine) and purposely change the name there. No lah, I'm kidding. I'm no techno-geek. :) I'm not saying that he is either. :)It's a boring day. My head suddenly hurts a bit. I'm currently listening to Point of No Return from Phantom of the Opera. By the way, I'll check out the dates of the musical when it comes next year. I'll try to get my dad to get tickets. :) Then maybe we could go dressing up formal like we planned. Awesome! :D It's not a sunny day today. Sad. Means something is not so right. Haix. I wish I was happily married with my husband sitting right next to me now, (picture this in my room) putting his head next to mine, watching my fingers type furiously at my balcony window, with the bright full moon (not so) and the skies dotted with shimmering glitter bits, with dim, soft lights in the backdrop. Then our eyes meet, I look at the boy, he looks at me. We share a smile. I cuddle into his arms and he embraces me tightly, yet so gently. Life couldn't be more perfect. :)When he proposes, you'll be the first one I'd call. :DYours sincerely,Denise Cheong"Wait!" Emily cried. Her words thick with tears, but she lifted her chin and crossed her arms tight over her chest to keep from shaking. "I, um, I have this problem. I broke up with my boyfriend, you see. And I'm pretty upset about it, so I wanted to talk to my best friend." She swallowed and looked at the black ground. "The thing is, they're both you."
"Emily," Chris whispered, and pulled her close.
She tried not to think of the unfamiliar scent of him, something perfumed mixed with something else lush and ripe. Instead Emily concentrated on the way it felt to be next to Chris again. Two halves of a whole.
He kissed her forehead, her eyelids. She buried her face against his shirt. "I can't stand it," she said, and she was not certain what she was talking about.
Suddenly Chris grasped her wrist. "Jesus," he said. "You're bleeding."
"I know. I cut myself."
"On what?"
Emily shook her head. "It's nothing," she said. But she let Chris lead her into the kitchen and sit her down while he retrieved a Band-Aid. If he noticed that his own initials were on her arm, he was wise enough to keep silent. She closed her eyes whil he touched her with all the care in the world, and she started to heal.
dear charlene,
i took 3 tries to recall your password. had to think for a few moments what your original password was. i didn't know you didn't change it. but it's ok. good that your passwords are still as lame as ever. i thought you'd change it after i nearly destroyed your reputation on friendster last year. okay, you don't want to recall that. *WiNkksXxXx* :)
so anyway, hello. i came to update your poor blog. hmmm. but i don't know what to update about. you can erm. go to aaron's blog and read what i tagged there. brilliant story. i have yet to update the story further. no inspiration. my brain feels a little cloudy now. i should be studying. and yes i will soon after i finish updating this.
so yesterday was my last day of school, nothing dramatic like a i expected. everyone is like, i don't know, no feelings. haha. i guess i regret not knowing my classmates better. i didn't seize the chance to make new friends during the past two years, and i'm not sure why. but its okay. next year, boys gallore. (mr chan always says.) i'll miss mr chan. he's moving to new zealand next year. so sad. we're going to have a party at his house after the exams. i can't wait. i hope to see him at eastpoint soon. he lives in simei too. mr chan went to RJC. like, what the. yeah, he's an insanely intelligent person. words cannot describe how much amusement i find in him. he was trying to tell our class what love is. he was like,
"You all are here because of love; because somewhere, someplace, somebody had
sex."
like, its true of course, but its just the way he manages to pull things off so so cynically and explicitly, that makes him so amusing. i would want to be his good friend. :)
i've been observing several teachers around school, one who caught my eye and certain interest is your chemistry teacher cum marathon runner cum guitar player - mr lian. (what's his name ar?) yup. is he attatched? he looks like he'll make a dedicated husband. he looks like the kind of person who would go to the ends of the earth to protect his wife, that kind of thing. yeah, he looks dedicated and amirable. i hope he gets married soon and finds love. :)
today on tv i saw this guy who has vague similarities with my one and only mr miyagi. haha. how charming. :) the tv show is channel 8 one. called ou xiang ba ba. or in english, oh daddy. not sure if you've watched it before. its quite funny. the father is the crazy army person. so cool lah. i've still been following bokura ga ita on youtube. it's getting a little bland and draggy because the poor girl cannot make up her mind. i feel like telling her, "GO FOR YANO, HE'S CUTER." haha. jk. but of course, EVERYONE knows she's going to pick yano anyway. episode 16 there's going to be fighting and alot of tears. haha. not like i'm excited to watch it. i'm quite tired of it actually. don't like the way the story is turning out.
anyway, your story right, still not written yet. haha. i need some time to review the story. in fact i forget the names of the characters. erm. james and who? james and elizabeth. yeah. if you somehow manage to come up with better names, please let me know. names are important, it can change your impression of the person. haha. i'm thinking its going to be a tragic story, of betrayal and love. tragic tragic tragic. bwarrhahaha.
so i've wasted a good amount of time updating on your behalf. i better get going now. talk to you soon! take care!
love your one and only,
Denise Cheong.
I am so so exhausted.
i've in the library and i have been in front of the com today for about 2 hours already just doing my F&n.
oh man.
i am stressed over one stupid coursework.
oh man.
im so tired.
everyone is so tired except the wonderful mel lee.lols.
im like gonna knock out anytime and im falling sick.
this is bad.
stupid andrea still can tell me that she's going tanning. some kinda friend lah!
lols
oh yeah
yesterday i was doing my f&n in school in the evening
suddenly mel pulled me out but she didnt say anything
so i thought she was gonna meet lenis outside school or something
then...
i saw this 3 pple who looked rather familiar
oh wow
it was denise, bryan and issac
lols
they bought me a cake and made me a card
a card in the shape of a cow and it was huge
lols.
so sweet
i gave denise a big hug but the guys didnt get any=))
ha
LOLS
im too lazy to write what happened after that so yeah=))
i am tired.
i wanna watch geisha.
i wanna go eat sashimi.
i wanna go cycling.
I WANNA SLEEP!!
oh well.
im gonna pon tutorial=))
LOLS.